Gossip, does it affect you? or do you let it go?…

Gossip:  stealing your rights…

It can be an uncomfortable feeling being part of a rumour or gossip, especially when people are talking about your family.

I recently had an encounter with a person who knows my ex-spouse and things of our relationship, things that happened during my divorce on other levels too.

Gossip...
If it's not true, it’s stealing your right of who you are. 
If it's true, it’s taking away your right to privacy and ownership of your own story.

I don’t have time for it, it’s a waste of energy, however, there was something this person said that made me curious, and from the comment I  wanted this person to elaborate.  But why?  Yes I felt winded, knocked down hard... but does it matter what ever this person would say? It wouldn't change the way I thought of myself, my ex and the way  I'm living my life.  So with that, I chose to remove myself from the conversation.

It made me think, was this person saying something to see my reaction? Or to hurt me... The reality is it’s not this persons business and to make a comment was hurtful. When this happens, you need to let it go, and not let it affect you. 

So how do you deal with someone like this person? How do you let go of the thoughts that run through your mind… wondering about what people are saying and what people think of you. 

People have opinions, we are humans, we are curious creatures, and the reality is there will always be opinions good and bad from people you know and people you don't know, or know your story.  Sadly, there isn’t a way to keep them from talking about you, but you have a choice on how you react and feel about it.  The people who gossip are selfish people, hurtful people and when others want to say things about you,  perhaps it's to make themselves feel good...

Was this person wanting to feel good? so they didn’t have to deal with their own personal issues?…

It takes a lot of effort to move on from an unhealthy relationship, from a broken marriage and when you heal yourself from within, you need to accept what you hear, whether it's true or not.  Don't give it a life and let the gossip interfere with how far you have come already, just let it go. 

Don’t let them dim your sparkle, and burst your bubble, you are better than that, and I want you to remember these four things next time you feel someone is trying to hurt you with gossip:

1. Don’t ask questions.  You know what your worth is.  You know your story, you know what happened and for the most of it, what is happening between you and your ex.  By not allowing the gossip to come in and affect your mental state, you can live the truth within yourself.
2. Their issue not yours.  Remember most of the time, people and especially ones that don’t even know you, may have an issue with your ex for whatever reason, remember their comments or behaviour is a reflection of their life and what ever happened between them has nothing to do with you.  You need to ask yourself, what is happening in their life, for them to want to say such things…
3. Don’t let it affect you.  Don’t allow this gossip to change the way you value yourself.  If the gossip comes out you need to remember what you know as the truth.  Your reaction will affect you.  So don’t react to them.  As mentioned above, you know your worth, you know your worth more than anyone and especially ones who want to try to hurt you.  Keep your head held high and live the way you have been living.  It’s really important to not retaliate or start rumours yourself.
4. Distance yourself from them.  If the people who are giving you grief and have been in contact with you with gossip, distance yourself from them.  Remove yourself from the situation immediately.  If they continue to contact you or want to contact you, put yourself in a situation with ones who you feel safe with and trust. If you are in contact with this person, be mindful of your conversations with them and always be polite, don’t give them a reaction they maybe looking for.

You are an amazing woman with your own beautiful gifts to share
with your community in your world. 

You have a right in this lifetime to not be judged… 
Don't give the gossip a life, let it go and move on.

GOSSIP:
casual or unconstrained conversation or reports about other people, typically involving details which are not confirmed as true.

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