Divorce sucks! No-one thinks it will ever happen to them, it only ever happens to other people, right? But when it happens to you, you find yourself questioning everything in life.
On my own divorce journey I realised that yes divorce marked the end of one part of my life, but it also was the beginning of another.
I allowed myself to be open to the divorce journey and feel everything that came my way
As hard as it is, you need to see the positive in your divorce. Even though it is one of the hardest things to go through, difficult to comprehend and it takes time to adjust, it can also be the most liberating experience too. You have a chance to live a life you wish for you. You have a chance to live a life you desire. You can now be YOU, just the way you want to be.
Don’t be afraid to feel divorce and embrace everything that comes with it. Feeling isolated and alone after a divorce will not serve you.
What did my Divorce teach me?
Divorce taught me:
to feel a roll coaster of emotions
I cried, I cried a lot. I would journal. I talked about it.
The longer you avoid your feelings, the longer it will take to heal. If you are having trouble feeling your pain, it’s likely that you are resisting it and resistance is a form of fear. You need to explore the fear of pain and get beneath the barriers and allow the feelings to flow. Don’t be afraid to cry and feel.
to accept my own company
I took off overseas and spent time by myself.
Spending time alone, can be very difficult, especially after your divorce. You have been in a relationship, a partnership with your spouse, and now you are in a relationship with yourself. Give yourself time to hang out with yourself. Don’t be afraid to go out and be. No-one is judging you, no-one is looking at you. Get yourself out into the world and just be. By giving yourself this time alone you can work out what your wants and needs are for the future.
to explore new things
I joined a new yoga studio, and took meditation classes.
Being in a relationship you tend to mould into one. Your experiences may not be exactly what you want. This is the perfect time to try new things. Dancing, travelling, art, whatever it is. Give the fear of not trying a go.
to open my heart
I reconnected with friends and started meeting new people.
As scary as it is, this is a chance for you to explore your feelings, whether it is to yourself or to others. Don’t be afraid to open up your heart and feel. It will take time, but don’t push it away. By pushing it away, you won’t give yourself a chance to open and feel the way you deserve to.
to live fearlessly and be brave
I finished my studies and started helping women through their own break-up journey.
Jump! Not literally. Feel the fear and push through it. When you feel fear, it usually means you want to do it. So do it. Be brave. What is it you want to do, yet YOU are holding yourself back? No turning back. You are now living in the now for the future. LIVE BRAVE LIVE FEARLESSLY.
to let go
I accepted him and forgave him.
When you forgive, you get your power back and you are able to let go and move forward. Remember the past is the past. Sure you will have times where the past will creep up and spook you, but you really need to let go. Without letting go, you cannot move forward properly, the past will always be there... Forgiveness and letting go is a choice. Make the choice to let go.
I love myself.
LOVE. It’s easy, you just have to remember to love yourself first. When you love yourself and love who you are, you will find yourself able to love the beauty in this world we live in, including the people around you. Loving yourself makes it easier for you to love again. Love everything about you and accept you.