How are you feeling today?
And how are you feeling in your relationships? With a partner, family members, friends, colleagues and even with yourself… Are you being your best self in these relationships?
If you are truly in a healthy relationship whatever type it is, you will feel at your best. When you are not feeling your best, what is happening? What is happening when you surround yourself with these people, are they constantly in your life? and if so, is there love?
Paying attention to how you feel is key to knowing if you are happy and being your best self. I’ve found at times depending who is in my life that I wasn’t being true to my values, lowering my standards to please. I would be questioning myself, or better yet, giving so much to them and getting nothing back. No… I didn’t want anything back, but when you find yourself giving and feeling less than you desire to feel, you need to ask yourself; is the relationship worth it? Worthy for you? Healthy for you?
Are you being your best self?
Be mindful how you are feeling, being in a relationship where you find yourself not being your best self, can have you feeling less than yourself. Being someone you are not… Going along with something you are not comfortable with. Maybe you find yourself draining your life energy. Feeling exhausted, depressed, isolating yourself, losing your appetite, or gaining an appetite? You feel like you are unable to grow.
Checking in with yourself on a daily basis is really important.
There are some women I support who are considering on leaving their spouse. It’s not my place to say heck yeah, he is not worthy of you, so leave. Key questions asked are, "Are you being your best self?" "Right now what is important to you in life?"
If you are in a relationship that is toxic no matter what type of relationship, you need to ask yourself:
Are we always arguing?
Am I doing what I love to do in my life?
Do I cringe when I see them, or try to avoid them?
Am I being honest with them and myself about how I feel around them?
Have I lost myself, my self-confidence?
Am I happy?
We are constantly evolving, and part of getting older is living, experiencing life, if you are in a relationship, it should allow you to grow into your best, unique, happy self. Relationships are meant to lift you up, not bring you down and belittle you.
What is stopping you for being your best self?
Do you feel pressured to stay in a relationship? And if you do, you need to ask yourself, am I being true to me? Don’t stay in a toxic relationship for the sole purpose of not wanting to be alone. If you feel like this, you need to work out why this is coming up for you, what do you fear about being alone? If you want to leave, you need to ask yourself if I leave, how will it make me feel?
Will I have a chance to be my best self if I am being honest in the relationship?
Sometimes we don’t have all the answers when we find ourselves in a toxic relationship, however, knowing and understanding how you feel, is important. By journaling how you feel, or meditating on it, or finding the right support, you will find the answers. It may seem scary, but the reality is, you are worth being your best self, and there is no one stopping you being that person except yourself.
It’s not easy living in a toxic relationship, but it is easy being your best self, you need to trust yourself and allow the love from within come.